Yeah, I know.
Worst Latin ever.
I did learn Latin as a child. Before you ask – no, I’m not a native speaker of that as well. How old do you think I am?! I know I said I was old right at the very beginning of all this, but I ain’t that old! And no, I don’t remember the dinosaurs either!
I do remember things like:
- humans landing on the moon
- if you missed you favourite television programme, tough – no video recorders, no cable, plus only having three television channels
- colour televisions being a luxury, not a basic life staple (as were cars)
- Non-decimal money, often referred to as L.S.D. No, nothing to do with lysergic acid, but back to good old Latin again… Librae, Soldi, Denarii. Don’t know if it was some kind of joke (and why would I have cared anyway?), but it was meant to be the Roman equivalent of pounds, shillings, pence
- BYO carrier bags
- encyclopaedias, not Wikipedia
- ‘Burger’ being something you muttered (quickly) under your breath when something went wrong
Oh. Massively off track as ever.
Focus!
So, it’s been nearly six months in our new little safe haven.
People are lovely here, and no one has a clue what I am.
So far, so good.
Long may it remain like that! One of the good things about living here is that it’s not an area exactly known for its sunny weather, so that in itself is a blessing!
With the differential in house prices in the two areas being what it is, we have moved from a one bedroom flat (no kids or dogs allowed) to a simply huge four bedroom house with a massive garden that one can get lost in! And dogs!
Well, we already have the dog, as you no doubt remember from the previous post…
Like me, the house is something of a mongrel.
It had been in the same family (not mine) since Victorian times (when it was built) and each generation has added something to it particular to their lifetime. It’s a live-in Museum in its own right. You can walk around the house playing “spot the era”. There are things here from the 20s, 30s, and so on and so forth. The 70s were a particularly active time in this house’s DIY history… Heaven help us…
A lot has been added to it. And when I say a lot I mean a lot. It had a patio, that became a conservatory that became a workshop, that became a kitchen. Well, the kind of kitchen that Dr Frankenstein would wake up in the night having the shakes over. Every time we prepared a meal, the uppermost thought in our minds wasn’t “Now, what drink would go well with this?”
No.
The uppermost thought was “Will I survive long enough to actually eat this?”
But it’s now a kitchen, a proper one!
A proper bathroom was added on. As was a utility room (that’s actually quite utile), which is about the only part of the house that doesn’t need something doing to it. Thankfully, It’s all cosmetic. But it’s a level of ‘cosmetic’ that would have Max Factor running for the hills.
But we love our conservatory. As does the dog. She can often be found in there, sat on the sofa, surveying her kingdom. When we want to get into the garden, sometimes we’re too lazy too unlock the back door, so we just go through the conservatory windows instead. I was born by Caesarean, so I have absolutely no problem with this.
There’s a lot to do.
And doing it is a cross between Pass The Parcel and Russian Roulette. While channeling Heath Robinson, who I believe may well have been the inspiration for much of the original alterations…
So here I go, paintbrush in hand.
Wish me luck.
The Everyday Vampire 